So I decided back in December to take the plunge into the deeper end of the crazy runner pool and signed up for the 50 mile race at Potawatomi. I've run a handful of marathons and 50k's and I have a number of friends that have done 50 and 100 milers so I wanted to step up and test myself and see if I had it in me.
Going into this race I knew physically I had it in me to finish, I may not be fast but I knew that I could cover the distance especially with an incredibly generous cut off this race offered. The biggest question was did I have mentally what it took to keep going once my body was tired, once I had done the loop 3 or 4 times already, could I mentally get over the obstacle of my brain telling me I was unable to go on. This was something that had been weighing on my mind throughout my training after my experience at Wildcat where I just wanted to be done and mentally quit at the 50k loop. Oh I justified it as I wasn't properly trained for a 50 miler, which I wasn't, I only just decided the week of to go for 50 miles, but that still doesn't change the fact that I let my insecurities and doubt get the better of me when I knew I could do something.
I rode down to Pekin with my buddy Jay who was planning on pacing me for a loop as well as a couple other people who where signed up for the 100 and 150. Having Jay crew me was going to be a big help because he knows just what buttons to push to keep me motivated and he has a lot more experience at the Ultra distances than I do. His first and best piece of advice was to tape my feet, I never would have considered this as I don't normally have issues with blisters on long runs, and it's hard to say if it prevented me from having blisters or it was just my normal good luck but I did not suffer a single blister on my feet with exception of one tiny one on the very tip of my creepy long toe on my right foot. The other advantage to having Jay there was his van which we camped out of instead of a tent which was very beneficial especially on the first night when it was quite cold. It also got us away from where everyone else was camping and the race start/finish line was at and thus extra noise, which allowed me to sleep great both the night before and the night after the race.
Race morning I woke up around 4:30 ready to go although I did lay in my sleeping bag for awhile longer since I literally only had to walk 100 feet to the start area once I was ready. After a brief pre race meeting which I honestly only was able to pay attention to part of we were ready to begin. All of the 50 and 100 mile entrants lined up, I settled myself right in the back where I belonged and we began. My plan which is a typical ultra mantra was to start off slow and then ease it back a little.
The first loop was really great, legs felt great after my taper and the course was beautiful especially as the sun was coming up. I generally take a "I'll just see what happens" approach when looking ahead at courses and it wasn't much different with this race. I knew there where going to be hills and I trained for them, I knew there where going to be water crossings and I practiced running with wet cold feet, but other than that I didn't worry too much about what the course had to offer. It was going to be what it was going to be and me over analyzing it wouldn't have changed anything.
Half way through the course is the Heavens Gate aid station, this is one thing about the course that I had spent some time looking into, mostly because I knew there would be delicious food there and since a majority of my running is motivated by my love of eating I was pumped up about this aid station. I was not disappointed on my first trip as I was greeted to pancakes, sausage and bacon along with the typical ultra running snack foods. I had myself a couple pieces of bacon wrapped in a pancake and was off. The second half of the course is by far the easier part (at least it was that way in my mind) plus knowing you've reached the half way point is a nice check point and helps keep the race smaller in my mind.
I finished up my first loop in right around 2:15 which I felt like was pretty good. Changed socks, stripped off my top layer grabbed my camera to take some photos of the course and headed back out. After a few minutes I realized not only did I forget my sunglasses but the battery on my camera was dead. Luckily the course doubles back after about a mile near the starting area so I darted over dropped off the camera and grabbed my sunglasses. The second loop was by far my favorite, I was still feeling great I had been through the course once and new what to expect, when to push and when to ease back, I really felt like I was on cruise control at this point. Not exactly sure what my time was for my second loop but it was pretty close to my first.
One mistake I now know I made on the second loop was I did not drink enough fluids so heading out on my third I had a plan to drink more frequently, this worked great with the exception of I forgot to refill the hydration pack at heaven's gate aid station and ran out shortly there after. Once again luck was shinning on me as there was a 5 gallon jug set out along the course that I was able to refill at. This was a huge boost mentally, if I would have had to suffer through the last few miles with out water it wouldn't have been that detrimental physically but mentally it could have put me in a bad place. One other piece of advice Jay had given me was don't start using trekking poles until you've had a loop where you wished you'd had them. It's pretty good advice since you don't want to carry around the extra weight if you don't need them and they could be a boost so don't waste it too early in the race. Well on the third loop I really wanted them, so bad in fact that I found a perfect stick to use in the meantime until I could get my poles. The stick worked out just fine and I was happy to have had it. The benefit especially for me is it allows me to use some of my upper body strength going up hills and it also gives you something to focus on as you are trotting along the flat sections.
The fourth loop was when Jay planned on picking me up and pacing me so after a quick stop, change of socks we were off. Jay helped keep me moving when I really didn't want to keep running, he kept giving me a hard time as he waited for me at the top of a hill saying stuff like "Hurry up, I've got things to do today" or "I've been waiting on you all day". I suppose these things could have very easily gotten under my skin but I knew he was just egging me on to keep me going and I knew he was only kidding around with me. Being a pacer is a tricky job you have to know the person you are pacing pretty well and be able to push them just enough to keep them going but not to far that you send them over the edge and Jay walked that tight rope with me perfectly. A good portion of the time he was out with me he actually spent talking to another QC runner that was right near us, and it was actually great to just listen to them talk. I spent a lot of time talking with various other runners during the course of the race but one that sticks out in particular is a women I met on the fourth loop we kept leap frogging each other and for awhile we played this game of tag your it, I would pass her when I was feeling good and she was walking and say "You're it" then a few minutes later she would pass me and tell me to catch up or something along those lines. The ultra running community is simply great, everyone is so positive and encouraging. Everyone I met along the course had great stories of why they were running or how they got there. There is just a vibe at Ultra's that you don't get at road races or triathlons, it's pretty cool.
As I was running the fourth loop the thought that I was actually going to do this started to wash over me and I was getting pretty excited to head out on the fifth and final loop. For the last loop Jay was going to let me go it alone and I was good with this, as much as I enjoy running with other people I really like running alone, locked inside my own head. The fourth loop was a nice break from myself but I was ready to just put my head phones on get lost in my music and thoughts as I tackled the course one last time. With a fresh pair of socks and my first shoe change I was ready to get things done.
The last loop was just about keeping myself going, I used all kinds of mental tricks to keep putting one foot in front of the other, like I would run until the current song ended or run a 100 steps and walk 20. Every time I passed a landmark I would think "That's the last time I get to see that rock" or "Last time up this hill" it was a nice feeling knowing that at this point, no matter what I was going to finish and I was excited. I took time to really thank all the volunteers at the aid stations, some of whom had been out there since Friday at noon and would go until Sunday at 4pm. They were doing their own Ultra of sorts and they were very much appreciated.
By the last loop I was having some major difficulty going up hill my legs were fried and it was a struggle to get my big body up. Going down was no problem and running the flattish parts was okay but going up just wasn't as easy. Which is pretty funny because that's when I met up with a guy and his pacer and he was passing me on the uphill and then waiting for me at the top so I could go ahead. See he was having no issues going up but could not handle the down hills, so much so he was forced to go backwards using his pacer as a spotter. I felt bad for the guy as this was probably a very difficult process, but he was in good spirits and even made some cracks about it as we passed each other, eventually I was able to pull away from them.
I really wanted to finish in under 13 hours but that wasn't going to happen, my main goal was not to have a 3 hour loop and I was going to be cutting it close and it got even closer right at the end. All day I was wondering if and when I was going to have to go #2, there were a number of out houses along the course so it wouldn't be an issue when and if the need arose. It finally hit me on the last mile of the race, I probably could have made it to the end but I wanted to run in and bask in the glow of the finality of the effort, not make a bee line to the nearest port a potty. So I hit the last out house on the course which was only a half mile to the finish. I did my business and got moving and finished up the last loop in 2:59 and change, close too close.
I crossed the finish line in 13 hours 14 minutes, after passing through a human tunnel of all the QC Hash runners that were down there supporting their friends and me as well. I was really thankful for all of their support especially from Butch and Moon who made sure I got everything I needed during my pit stops. Everyone made me feel like part of the group even though I only know a handful of them through Jay and a few runs together, they all supported me and celebrated in my accomplishment which was truly awesome.
After the race the next day I was thinking back on the whole thing and I was pondering on the mental toughness aspect and it dawned on me that I never had that super low moment where I wanted to quit and give up. At first this kind of bummed me out because one of the big questions I had going in was do I have what it takes mentally to keep going when i want to quit. I guess in a way I was disappointed that I didn't hit that point and then get to battle through it. Then it occurred to me that maybe I never had that moment where I had to test my mental toughness because I had prepared myself thoroughly enough that I was always one step ahead and therefore didn't need to test my toughness because it was already being displayed. Yeah I'm good with that.
So now a few days have passed and I've had time to reflect and look back on the whole experience, not just the race but the last 5 months of serious training and really the last couple of years where I've really gotten in to this endurance stuff. I can't say that I've come to some deep understanding of life or wisdom that only comes from 13 hours of continuous running but I do believe I have a better understanding of what it is I truly enjoy doing. This race has definitely altered my perspective on some things and in a way I'm really happy about that. I haven't been that keyed up about my half iron triathlon in July, the thought that I was done with Tri's has been bouncing around in my head for some time since my bike accident but now it may be even more solidified... we'll see what happens. I did have this crazy thought on Monday night after brushing my teeth getting ready for bed, running 100 miles doesn't scare the crap out of me nearly as much now as it did a few months ago... who knows maybe next year I'll tackle the 100 mile distance?
Until next time...Do today what others won't, so tomorrow you can do what others can't.
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